I may not be blogging as much about Abot Tala as before but I’m doing more things for Abot Tala than ever before. The biggest challenge is still finding the space. Promising spaces turn out like some love stories — sadly but simply not-meant-to-be. Some are way out as in interstellar way out of budget and the ones within the budget, you’d understand why. The ideal is still to find a super-ally-supporter-believer who has property or connections to those with property to share for this cause. We’ve looked at co-working spaces, houses, offices, old, new, bare and ready-to-move-in, but still no match because it’s probably still being made in heaven. Ordered already but the delivery is taking the roundabout route. It’s still brewing and being perfected for us so that when we step in, that convergence of a-ha’s happens and we would know why it took us this length of time to find it.
I’d like to list down all the people I’ve met in this journey, how the links were made like a web forming itself gracefully, organically, one introduction leading to another leading to another, amazing people who do what they say and not just say something without follow through. Grateful for the growing constellation but there are days when I fail to see the big picture and the narrowness of vision drowns out the good that is already being built. Doubts and frustrations creep in but they need to be set aside for productivity’s sake but productivity is not enough. You go back to the “why” that gave you the strength in the first place, the “why” that often gets lost amidst the “doing.” Thank goodness for souls who remind us of those whys.
When the rhetorical “Why am I doing this?” gets crowded out by “You’re not good enough to do this,” it’s time to dig deeper and fish out something from the depths that got covered in slime and muck. You have to extend your whole arm to get at it when it wants half your body submerged. No, not even. Your whole body needs to dive in. Please lend me another metaphor.
The sweat metaphor. I’ve been going to the gym but cheating and doing only fifteen minutes at a time. Quickie because I’m ADHD in the gym. The gym coach said it’s not going to work that way because I’m not sweating. You have to sweat, he said. I thought, is that a metaphor for the Abot Tala? I haven’t sweated enough, I haven’t gone out of my comfort zone enough? I tell somebody this metaphor and maybe, she said, that’s not necessarily the case.
Going back to the why. There are people in my family I think would have benefited from something like Abot Tala if it had existed back then when I felt powerless, clueless, “skill-less” to help. I could imagine all the people who could be helped by this. And that’s good enough to keep me going, not to mention having team mates with superpowers and strengths different from those I possess. Team effort makes up for whatever self-limiting beliefs cripple you at the moment.
Check out https://abottala.com/